Well, November 25th has come and gone and I've seen the end of another Missouri rifle season. If you're a non hunter or you frankly don't care, the season I'm referring to is the classic hunting season for whitetail deer. It is heavily revered by many a rural midwestern folk as well as city dwelling quasi and wanna-be hunters.
My season actually began with archery tackle back on September 15. Until the opening of rifle season, I hunted pretty regularly once a week (in the evenings on my day off, Mondays) and was able to squeeze in an occasional second evening depending on my schedule. Overall before rifle season began I think it's safe to say that I averaged roughly 1.5 evenings in the woods through the fall. It has been my intention this year to be very careful about the priorities that I've given through this particular season as my desire is to continue to place my family and ministry at the top. I had some good encounters with both does and bucks (males and females for the layman) but never quite got the chance to fling an arrow at either. One particular cold Monday evening in October I was able to call in a buck with grunts and snorts and got him close, but not quite close enough for the closing darkness. He would be the last legal buck I would see even through the close of rifle season. He was a monster 8-point.
Archery season gave way to changing colors and falling leaves and cooler weather. My favorite time of year. And not just because of deer season. I love the way things die after a season, only preparing to sleep for the winter and start over in the spring. I love what it symbolizes. Anyway, I digress, those feelings are for another post. With archery season closing and rifle season looming near, I had but a few responsibilities to cover before getting my chance in the woods with the boom stick. A Saturday men's conference at a nearby church, then Sunday activities and hanging with Ruthi after so Brandi could attend a wake for a dear friend who had recently lost her life to leukemia. Both important events worthy of my time. Saturday the 15th was the first opening day I've missed since my Freshman year of college. Yes, that was 10 years ago.
The weather was tough and windy that weekend, and only a couple of my friends scored on decent bucks, so I was excited to finally get my chance in the woods on my day off Monday. The plan was to stay in the stand the entire day from dawn to dusk, as it is well known that many large bucks move most heavily from 10-2. But I am not a trophy hunter, I am thankful for whatever the Lord puts in my path, plus I was eager to put some meat in the freezer. I sat all day Monday in the heavy wind and cold and saw nothing shootable. I sat Tuesday night, and Thursday night, and Saturday night (when I got to be with my Dad's first harvest in 3 years!), and tonight, Monday night and have not yet had a chance at a shot.
My frustration has mounted to the point that I have begun bargaining with God, adding up my brownie points trying to convince Him to send a big one my way. For example, I skipped opening day to attend the men's conference, and the second day to allow Brandi to go to the wake.
That should be enough, right?
Then, I skipped the second Saturday morning and afternoon to help work on a church members roof, which I've paid dearly for in physical woes (I know, feel so sorry for me). Then on Sunday I didn't go out at all despite perfect weather so I could watch Ruthi for Brandi who has been ill and to visit a parent of one of our church family who has just learned he has cancer.
That should be enough too, right?
I have tried extra hard and pushed to put my family and GOD's ministry ahead of any of my hunting desires this year, and suceeded well. I have limited my evenings in the woods (with the exception of my most recent push during rifle season) and communicated openly with my family and my boss about when I am hunting and if I am not, why I've chosen not to.
That should be more than enough, right?
Wrong. Unfortunately, somehow as a human being I've ingrained in myself that by sacrificing for the Lord I begin to accumulate and earn "Brownie Points" that I can either cash in or at some point expect a tremendous blessing that will be passed down on me for my obedience in this life. What's even more audacious is that for whatever reason I feel like I can cash in my sacrifices and obediences in one particular area, which in this case would be harvesting a tasty white tailed critter. However, in my growing Christian maturity and understanding of the Lord, it's becoming more and more evident to me that this is not how the Creator of the Universe operates. And, while the idea of Karma seems like a fair principal of justification in the world, I believe the principals taken from this verse should stop being taken out of context:
"Do not be deceived: God cannot be mocked. A man reaps what he sows. The one who sows to please his sinful nature, from that nature will reap destruction; the one who sows to please the Spirit, from the Spirit will reap eternal life." Galatians 6:7-8
We (I) like to take the first part of this verse and run with it don't we? If I continue to live my life in balance to try and please God with how "EVEN" I'm being there's a pretty good chance I'm doing it for the wrong reasons. By trying to add up time in specific areas, to please specific people, including myself, it sounds like I'm working my way to justify time spent with something that pleases me. Does hunting feed my sinful nature? No. I regret taking the life of any living creature in vain. This is why I practice and develop my skill so when the time comes, my kill will be swift and accurate. I hunt to be in nature, to enjoy God's creation, feed my family, and enjoy the challenge of outwitting a natural survivor in their own environment.
The big ticket here is my INTENTIONS.
Am I seeking to live in the Spirit because I want to dwell in the presence of God or because I am merely trying to preserve balance among different parts of my life? Through this fall it has dawned on me that I will reap what I sow in life, but as evidenced in the verse above it appears that I may have my rewards a bit confused. You see by wanting to keep balance and please the Lord, my family, my employers and myself, I've sought to receive my reward on this earth for the things I am doing now. I think my view and feelings of this are pretty common among the world around us today. When we are motivated to work towards a reward, aren't we most often looking for it in this life? What about the reward of eternal life? Isn't that the ultimate reward and the ultimate goal? Isn't that what I should be working towards instead of building up enough points to get a shot at a big buck or a longbeard turkey? I think so.
So unfortunately, God doesn't seem to operate on a brownie points type of system, at least not in this life anyway. And while I'm sure he cares about every little thing that I'm interested in, I'm sure that his greatest concern is the condition of my heart, and the choices I make to help others learn about reaping an eternal harvest. While the above verse is not the only one in the Bible, it sure is a great reminder that things of the mortal world are passing. I'm going to continue hunting, and maybe I still will be blessed with a chance to take an animal before the muzzleloading and archery seasons draw to a close, don' worry about that. In the meantime though, here are a couple of other verses that lead into what I referred to above as "Christian Karma."
Can I ask this? What are you trying to bargain for a blessing from the Lord with?
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